Reverberation

Ever morning, I look in the mirror and say, “What are you smiling about?”. I start reminiscing, pondering whether I have anything to thank for from this small and stupid life. I stare blankly at the mirror at first. Then I begin to frown; my forehead starting to wrinkle from the stress of stressing myself. I sigh in frustration and open the faucet. The freezing, 4am temperature of the water wakes me and brings me back to reality. It’s time to go to work. I look around and realize that I’m not the only one grumbling, silently cursing the morning traffic jam. I unknowingly overhear a conversation of two of the jeepney passengers. One mutters, “Sus, ingani nasad ka traffic unyang hapon inig uli. Di na jud mo asenso ang Pilipinas!” (I bet the trafiic situation will be like this later in the after noon. The Philippines will never progress!); her voice trailing off as her words seep into my mind, lodging a thousand words. I was not a philosophy major. But I knew then, that her point of view was one that would give Socrates and his successors a sense of pride for what they had evoked upon the minds of many. I would normally dismiss such words and bury them under the most dorsal part of me, supporting my decision with the fact that I am just a simple citizen of this country, what can I do? But then, I start to think, these are the kind of behavior that bring about such comments.

The jeepney comes to a halt and a guy tries to squeeze his butt inside the crammed up jeepney. The thought that jeepneys have a 18-passenger capacity, provided that the latter is as thin as paper, immediately came fluttering around my think tank. I was going to catch a quick nap before I reached Lahug but then this guy brought out his mobile phone and started punching like crazy, sans the keypad tone which would give any normal person the initiative to plot vengeance. As if this was not irritating enough, we were in a dead zone. Ears are meant to be lent. But they’d rather have taken a back seat that time. The “Message Not Sent” beep was killing my two lovelies! What was this guy trying to do? Give us all auditory defects? Was it me or was everything getting to the driver too? He started honking at the pedestrians crossing the street, oblivious to the fact that the lights already signaled red. I tried shutting my ears from the world during that present scenario but to no avail, I was not able to catch a single wink. All this, and it wasn’t even raining. "Mag taxi jud ko unya inig uli kay para makapahuway ko." (I will definitely hail a cab later so I can rest well.) I got off the “teleserye” ride when we reached Salinas Drive. I hope the 9 - hour shift will zoom past me so I can go home to my friend’s house – my only refuge.

After hours of ranting, I was all ready to go. Drat! It felt like hell stepping out of the office's air-conditioned premises. Just a few steps to the jeepney stop and I was there. As I got in and waited for the jeepney to hit the road, I began to recognize that familiar smell passengers chance to whiff each time they take the ride. When will all the PUJs be equipped with air conditioners or should we say odor blasters? Even the humid atmosphere inside the train seemed to take shape and form a veil around me, making me even more uncomfortable. Little did I know, this was just the beginning of another hilarious adventure. I couldn’t help but smirk when two men started shouting, each accusing the other of having the bad odor. I was grinning from ear to ear and before I knew it, all the other passengers were gregariously laughing, some, routing for one of the two contenders; some, stoking fire on the two’s already heated argument; some, commenting out loud that we all had the same uninviting scent, thanks to the jeepney's crammed up accommodations; and some simply shrugging off the petty incident.

Robinson's Mall! This was where I finally got off. I rode a jeepney to Mandaue, considering the smoke from the passing vehicles my final touch-up. I arrived at A’s house, an ugly wreck. But he smiled, asked me to come in, offered me his towel to freshen up, and bought bottled water from the sari-sari store across. We had a rich conversation of funny experiences and instances you’d love to abhor’ our personal vendettas, and our not-so-secret aspirations. This was when my post-thoughts earlier in the morning came flooding back. What did I have to thank for in my life? Then the answer turned crystal. The simple things of course! Turning bad things into a good laugh, a friend being there for you, signs and mementos of love, prayer. It’s nice to know that everything is not so senseless. That there is always purpose whether it be for the simple reason of reflection, or for the optimistic reason of making a difference.

Every morning, I look in the mirror and say, “What are you smiling about?”. I start reminiscing, pondering whether I have anything to thank for from this small and stupid life. I stare blankly at the mirror at first. Yeah, I have a lot - friends and loved ones, food on the table, the crisp sound of a hundred peso bills, my job, being able to learn a new vocabulary (so feeling genius for a second)... That's indeed a lot! Then I begin to frown; my forehead starting to wrinkle from the stress of stressing myself. I sigh in frustration and open the faucet. I'll just think later. The freezing, 4am temperature of the water wakes me and brings me back to reality. It’s time to go to work.