So I haven't been writing for the longest time.. I wouldnt make work the excuse this time because really, twas my decision not to write at all. I felt like all the things running around my head were nonsensical piece of crap that I opted to keep them in the remote areas of my consciousness.
How am I? Loaded. And that is even an understatement. 'Tis one of those days when you'd want to summon all the gods of the earth to just eat you alive. Stress level in the work place has reached the ultimate level of my tolerance and believe me, what I would give to be able to chase adrenaline like a junkie again. I mean seriously, all that politicking and self - gratification has weakened me to the core. An emotional wreck!
Take for example the fact that people are disappearing like hell and resigning because some idiots just don't know how to compromise. We are losing tenured agents because apparently management (that includes me) are so obsessed with pleasing the clients without even realizing that agents are already pitied against each other. I asked myself a million times what I can do to at least reach out to them but it turns out that my hands are tied, mouth is glued, and my principles are even stuck on some baseless judgment. Yes, I feel so disabled and it's hell of a frustration to look at them suffer and left to lick their wounds and whimper in the brush! That alone stresses the hell out of me... Messianic complex. I wish I can do something. But yeah, even wishing turned out to be nothing but an elusive dream.
That among others, has caused nothing but erratic surge and yes, I am already choking.
Somebody call 911.
How am I? Loaded. And that is even an understatement. 'Tis one of those days when you'd want to summon all the gods of the earth to just eat you alive. Stress level in the work place has reached the ultimate level of my tolerance and believe me, what I would give to be able to chase adrenaline like a junkie again. I mean seriously, all that politicking and self - gratification has weakened me to the core. An emotional wreck!
Take for example the fact that people are disappearing like hell and resigning because some idiots just don't know how to compromise. We are losing tenured agents because apparently management (that includes me) are so obsessed with pleasing the clients without even realizing that agents are already pitied against each other. I asked myself a million times what I can do to at least reach out to them but it turns out that my hands are tied, mouth is glued, and my principles are even stuck on some baseless judgment. Yes, I feel so disabled and it's hell of a frustration to look at them suffer and left to lick their wounds and whimper in the brush! That alone stresses the hell out of me... Messianic complex. I wish I can do something. But yeah, even wishing turned out to be nothing but an elusive dream.
That among others, has caused nothing but erratic surge and yes, I am already choking.
Somebody call 911.
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